welcome reilly!
09/11/08
A soft warm welcoming hug to our very newest addition and our youngest moltohappy member yet, Reilly!
congratulations Nicola and Jon!
moods swing...
24/10/08
dw
It can't rain forever
29/05/08
Are
you happy today? How do you know? Is it not thanks to a bad day you
had this week that you can compare it with? We need the bad times
to recognize the good ones. We need to feel miserable to appreciate
the days when we laugh for no reason; We need to feel sleepy, to
appreciate feeling awake; Need to feel sick to appreciate feeling
great!
Victor Frankl claimed that there were three ways for us to discover
meaning in our life; the third being the attitude we take toward
unavoidable suffering (Frankl, 1946). Of course Frankl’s suffering
was extreme and one could never compare the torture of a
concentration camp with a bad day in the office, but the concept he
offered us is the same. It is our reaction to the bad days that
makes everything fall into place. It is accepting that this moment
will pass and that whilst changing the situation may beyond our
control – controlling our reaction to the situation remains
entirely within our power.
Happiness isn’t a black or white, yes or no matter; it’s a scale.
There are very, very good days at the top and there are very, very
bad days at the bottom but there are millions of average days in
between and we can make them decent.
Some
suffering is inevitable; bad health, the end of a relationship, a
lost loved-one, an unexpected accident, a betrayal, an insult, a
blow… sooner or later we may all be hit hard. But it is also
necessary and the secret to success is living it with calm
serenity, accepting it and using the time to collect your energies,
get up and move on.
So next time you are down there at rock bottom with an aching in
your heart, stay there for a while and just look up, observe what
you see, decide where to go next and how, enjoy the undemanding
still, collect your thought and then, when you are ready, stand
tall and act.
"Man
is capable of changing the world for the better if possible, and of
changing himself for the better if necessary." Viktor
Frankl.
dw
Sources and further reading:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Man%27s_Search_for_Meaning
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Viktor_Frankl
http://www.amazon.com/Will-Meaning-Foundations-Applications-Logotherapy/dp/0452010349
Felicità
28/05/08
Happiness is...
30/04/08
Happy Easter
21/03/08
It’s time to clean out, dust off, freshen up and start again. The warm sun and dazzling days bring with them the desire to channel our bright ideas and creativity into something concrete, to let loose our vivid colours, brilliant energy and refreshing vitality and confront the challenges of the year to come with confidence and determination.
moltohappy has been infected by the feelings of spring too and is celebrating with a new look and some lively ideas. So join in the fun, drop us a line, and spread the spring!
dw
Sono felice?
23/01/08
Spesso
ci domandiamo cos'e' la felicità. Io non so cosa sia, la felicità è
eterea ed in quanto tale può essere solo vissuta, immaginata,
sentita.
Possiamo però provare a creare le condizioni perché essa viva dentro di noi concentrandoci su ciò che abbiamo attorno, su quelle cose che possono apparire banali, scontate, quotidiane;
Dove trovo Io la felicità?
Quando regalo un sorriso.. anche a chi non ne ha bisogno.
Quando ammiro l'immensità' del mare e ne vengo rapito.
Quando guardo gli occhi dei miei figli e leggo la sincerità del loro amore.
Sono felice?
Si.
mb
Possiamo però provare a creare le condizioni perché essa viva dentro di noi concentrandoci su ciò che abbiamo attorno, su quelle cose che possono apparire banali, scontate, quotidiane;
Dove trovo Io la felicità?
Quando regalo un sorriso.. anche a chi non ne ha bisogno.
Quando ammiro l'immensità' del mare e ne vengo rapito.
Quando guardo gli occhi dei miei figli e leggo la sincerità del loro amore.
Sono felice?
Si.
mb
We all go gaga for a smile...
18/01/08
There
is something about a baby’s smile, that’s different to anyone
else’s. It’s a heartfelt and meaningful smile (how many babies have
you seen faking smiles?). It’s a short outburst offered in return
for an eccentric yelp, a silly tickle or a ridiculous face. It’s
one of life’s pleasures that I have recently become addicted
to.
She
looks at me, wide-eyed and beautiful, waiting, patiently and
eagerly for me to do something entertaining, and when I do – how
could you not? – that’s it, she squeals and giggles, flashing me
her pink gummy smile and dazzling eyes. Then she stops, a wind-up
toy, wound down. She looks at me, face still, head on one side,
mouth closed; with only her vivid eyes telling me that I have to do
it again if I want to see her smile a little longer.
So I do, and she does.
I’ve ditched my healthy breakfast at home, no more tea and cereals; I have to go to the bar every morning for my daily fix before I can even think about walking into work; but it’s not the espresso shot that gives me my kick in the morning, it’s twinkling over someone’s little jewel, a jewel named Izzy, proud that for five minutes, those smiles are all for me.
The most heart-warming five minutes of my day, that make me really, moltohappy.
dw
So I do, and she does.
I’ve ditched my healthy breakfast at home, no more tea and cereals; I have to go to the bar every morning for my daily fix before I can even think about walking into work; but it’s not the espresso shot that gives me my kick in the morning, it’s twinkling over someone’s little jewel, a jewel named Izzy, proud that for five minutes, those smiles are all for me.
The most heart-warming five minutes of my day, that make me really, moltohappy.
dw
Mare aperto...
08/01/08
Il
link al tuo sito che mi hai fornito in una mail prenatalizia è
rimasto a lungo impresso semidimenticato nel fondo della mia
memoria, prima che di lì risalisse al livello di coscienza. E'
successo poco fa, durante le vacanze - periodo propizio alla
riflessione - e subito mi sono fermato alla prima riga della
homepage: confesso con un pò di vergogna che non sapevo di Scrooge
e mi ci è voluto un pò a leggere la sintesi dell'opera di Dickens
(figurarsi se al liceo classico negli anni '70 si sapeva della
letteratura inglese, semmai francese !).
Dopo aver saputo chi è Scrooge (e un pò mi sono immedesimato in lui) sono tornato a navigare un pò il sito, restandone a metà tra l'estasiato e l'attonito, cioè sospeso tra sentimenti forti.
Non sono riuscito a comprendere le ragioni dell'esistenza di quelle pagine di foto e testi - complice anche la barriera linguistica - se non immaginando l'esigenza forte dela sua autrice, o dei suoi autori (vedo foto di elfi, neonati, attempati signori canuti, donne in maggioranza, tutti molto sorridenti...) di affidarsi ad una navigazione nel mare della vita, essendo al tempo stesso marinai e naufraghi, per incontrare altri marinai e naufraghi.
La prima uscita dal porto è riuscita, stiamo a vedere come andrà con il mare aperto…
pd
Dopo aver saputo chi è Scrooge (e un pò mi sono immedesimato in lui) sono tornato a navigare un pò il sito, restandone a metà tra l'estasiato e l'attonito, cioè sospeso tra sentimenti forti.
Non sono riuscito a comprendere le ragioni dell'esistenza di quelle pagine di foto e testi - complice anche la barriera linguistica - se non immaginando l'esigenza forte dela sua autrice, o dei suoi autori (vedo foto di elfi, neonati, attempati signori canuti, donne in maggioranza, tutti molto sorridenti...) di affidarsi ad una navigazione nel mare della vita, essendo al tempo stesso marinai e naufraghi, per incontrare altri marinai e naufraghi.
La prima uscita dal porto è riuscita, stiamo a vedere come andrà con il mare aperto…
pd
Bah.. humbug..
16/12/07
I
am one of the many people for whom December brings a battle; trying
to convert Scrooge into Santa’s little helper has never been easy,
and rarely successful.
How do you explain to someone what Festive Spirit is and how to feel it? It’s just there, like feeling hungry or sleepy. How can you make them feel that same tingling in your tummy and spontaneous smiling that comes just from hearing a Christmas song on the radio, in November?
“Christmas is just a commercial excuse to make people spend their money and boost the economy”
Well, at least the economy gets a boost once a year! Let’s face it, a third of annual sales are made in the Christmas period, think how depressed the economy would be without it! and what are you saving your money for anyway?! you can’t take it with you when you time is up!
“It’s just a day like any other”
How many days a year do you wake up at the crack of dawn because the excitement in your tummy is just too much to contain, have a champagne and smoked salmon breakfast in your pyjamas, open an abundance of presents and gifts from the people that love you, dance around the kitchen to Christmas music, making a feast with your family, eat until you are fit to burst and then spend the afternoon on the sofa like a beached whale splitting your sides to BBC comedy?
“Christmas shopping means fighting with people and pushchairs in crammed streets to buy overpriced presents that you HAVE TO get for someone…”
It means wandering the cobbled alleyways illuminated and cheery with Christmas lights and music, trees and decorations; all wrapped up against the winter chill, breathing clouds of hot breath into the frosty air. Stopping to sip on mulled wine and hot chocolate, and say hi to all the people that despite living in your village, you don’t see from one month to the next.
“A Christmas tree? It’s a real tree that you savaged pulled from the earth!”
Okay, fair point, and calmly accepted. We’ll have a plastic one!
“Christmas is a sacred religious festival, you don’t even go to church…”
Very true. Admittedly, my Christmas is not about church and remembering the real meaning of Christmas, as it originated; but we each find in it what we want to find. For me it’s a time of traditions, family, friends, fun, travelling from our distant corners of the globe to meet together and share love and laughter.
“Christmas is a time for children, we don’t have any…”
Oh yes you do! You may not have fathered any children, but each of us has one… inside! If you aren’t capable of getting in touch with your inner child, just once a year, along with everyone else, with the excuse of Christmas time, then you have more serious problems than a Christmas list to face!
There comes a moment when even the most convincing Christmas fairy, like myself, just shrugs and gives up. The time spent in trying to convert the anti-Christmas-squad, is time I could be investing in wrapping, decorating, shopping, singing… or even packing. Yes, packing, my case. For my very first family Christmas on a Spanish island ;-)
After all, Christmas – like life – is what you make of it.
We wish you a moltohappy christmas!! :)
dw
How do you explain to someone what Festive Spirit is and how to feel it? It’s just there, like feeling hungry or sleepy. How can you make them feel that same tingling in your tummy and spontaneous smiling that comes just from hearing a Christmas song on the radio, in November?
“Christmas is just a commercial excuse to make people spend their money and boost the economy”
Well, at least the economy gets a boost once a year! Let’s face it, a third of annual sales are made in the Christmas period, think how depressed the economy would be without it! and what are you saving your money for anyway?! you can’t take it with you when you time is up!
“It’s just a day like any other”
How many days a year do you wake up at the crack of dawn because the excitement in your tummy is just too much to contain, have a champagne and smoked salmon breakfast in your pyjamas, open an abundance of presents and gifts from the people that love you, dance around the kitchen to Christmas music, making a feast with your family, eat until you are fit to burst and then spend the afternoon on the sofa like a beached whale splitting your sides to BBC comedy?
“Christmas shopping means fighting with people and pushchairs in crammed streets to buy overpriced presents that you HAVE TO get for someone…”
It means wandering the cobbled alleyways illuminated and cheery with Christmas lights and music, trees and decorations; all wrapped up against the winter chill, breathing clouds of hot breath into the frosty air. Stopping to sip on mulled wine and hot chocolate, and say hi to all the people that despite living in your village, you don’t see from one month to the next.
“A Christmas tree? It’s a real tree that you savaged pulled from the earth!”
Okay, fair point, and calmly accepted. We’ll have a plastic one!
“Christmas is a sacred religious festival, you don’t even go to church…”
Very true. Admittedly, my Christmas is not about church and remembering the real meaning of Christmas, as it originated; but we each find in it what we want to find. For me it’s a time of traditions, family, friends, fun, travelling from our distant corners of the globe to meet together and share love and laughter.
“Christmas is a time for children, we don’t have any…”
Oh yes you do! You may not have fathered any children, but each of us has one… inside! If you aren’t capable of getting in touch with your inner child, just once a year, along with everyone else, with the excuse of Christmas time, then you have more serious problems than a Christmas list to face!
There comes a moment when even the most convincing Christmas fairy, like myself, just shrugs and gives up. The time spent in trying to convert the anti-Christmas-squad, is time I could be investing in wrapping, decorating, shopping, singing… or even packing. Yes, packing, my case. For my very first family Christmas on a Spanish island ;-)
After all, Christmas – like life – is what you make of it.
We wish you a moltohappy christmas!! :)
dw
"I once had a dream, or should I say, a dream once had me.."
30/11/07
Everyone
has at least one dream, don’t they? Admittedly, some are more
realistic than others. Some are secret. Some are shared. Some last
days, some years, others a lifetime. Some will come true, some may,
others won’t.
To be famous, retire to a smallholding en Provence, have a traditional white wedding, make a million, own your own property, run your own company, become a national champion, have green eyes, speak four languages, sleep with a Hollywood film star, travel the world, have a child…
Some dreams, are goals.
They are clear objectives, they have a destination, they are attainable, there are clear practical steps you must take to get there, and if you are dedicated, consistent, careful and proactive; you will.
Then there are the others.
They are fantasies, highly unlikely to come true, far-fetched, difficult even to contemplate, and yet you refuse to admit that they are never going to happen. Instead you spend hours daydreaming, planning what to do, preparing what to say, waiting patiently…
Some
think that dreaming is a complete waste of energy. Instead of
fantasising about a happy life for yourself, you could actually be
doing something to attain one. Every moment spent imagining she is
the one, is a moment lost in the search for her. Every warped
belief that it “could one day happen” is merely unfair, misleading
and deceptive to the real you, who sooner or later has to face the
reality that it is never going to happen. (Of course for a
‘serious’ dreamer the suffering doesn’t end there either, because
on facing this harsh truth, they are also obliged to re-evaluate
each of their lifelong dreams and consequently - in light of this
new reality - create a repertoire of new ones!)
Fortunately for me, there are many ‘serious’ dreamers out there; sincere, genuine, dedicated, determined, fantasists - for whom dreaming is essential to existence.
I say ‘fortunately’ because I happen to be one and am delighted to know that I am not alone.
You see, dreaming gives me something to look forward to, it’s the sun behind the clouds, a safety-blanket, a warm hug, and above all it is a white canvas: whilst my real world is a cage of boundaries, rules and regulations; in my daydreams I am free, unregimented, uninhibited and liberated.
The problem, as always, is where the two worlds collide…
In the collision, non-dreamers feel it their responsibility to re-educate dreamers into being more realistic and practical citizens; trying to persuade them that it’s all for their own good, and convince them that living in a dream world is bad for them; a source of constant disappointment.
Is it?
Does it really hurt to live in a dream world? Is life more disappointing for a dreamer? Or are there simply more enjoyable moments - real or reverie - between one disappointment and the next?
Does knowing that a dream won’t come true make it any less pleasurable? Isn’t that the whole point… to live in hope, or the bliss of ignorance?
Can
we not just entertain the dreamers? What difference does it make?
Ok, so we know it’s never going to happen, and we know that it
isn’t the last we’ll hear of it, but what do we gain by popping
their bubble?
So the next time your dreamer falls into their usual trance and whispers something about not going to the office tomorrow, picking up a camper van in the morning and travelling Spain, to find a crumbling castle desperate of renovation, and an idyllic vineyard to make flowing rivers of the finest vino tinto; take a deep breath. Smile. Don’t mention the fact that they don’t know their Cabernet from their Chardonnay. Don’t dare suggest that they learn the lingo and don’t utter a word about the economical and practical unfeasibility. You are wasting your time. A dreamer is a dreamer, and always will be. So just smile, play along and order Sangria… ;)
dw
To be famous, retire to a smallholding en Provence, have a traditional white wedding, make a million, own your own property, run your own company, become a national champion, have green eyes, speak four languages, sleep with a Hollywood film star, travel the world, have a child…
Some dreams, are goals.
They are clear objectives, they have a destination, they are attainable, there are clear practical steps you must take to get there, and if you are dedicated, consistent, careful and proactive; you will.
Then there are the others.
They are fantasies, highly unlikely to come true, far-fetched, difficult even to contemplate, and yet you refuse to admit that they are never going to happen. Instead you spend hours daydreaming, planning what to do, preparing what to say, waiting patiently…
Fortunately for me, there are many ‘serious’ dreamers out there; sincere, genuine, dedicated, determined, fantasists - for whom dreaming is essential to existence.
I say ‘fortunately’ because I happen to be one and am delighted to know that I am not alone.
You see, dreaming gives me something to look forward to, it’s the sun behind the clouds, a safety-blanket, a warm hug, and above all it is a white canvas: whilst my real world is a cage of boundaries, rules and regulations; in my daydreams I am free, unregimented, uninhibited and liberated.
The problem, as always, is where the two worlds collide…
In the collision, non-dreamers feel it their responsibility to re-educate dreamers into being more realistic and practical citizens; trying to persuade them that it’s all for their own good, and convince them that living in a dream world is bad for them; a source of constant disappointment.
Is it?
Does it really hurt to live in a dream world? Is life more disappointing for a dreamer? Or are there simply more enjoyable moments - real or reverie - between one disappointment and the next?
Does knowing that a dream won’t come true make it any less pleasurable? Isn’t that the whole point… to live in hope, or the bliss of ignorance?
So the next time your dreamer falls into their usual trance and whispers something about not going to the office tomorrow, picking up a camper van in the morning and travelling Spain, to find a crumbling castle desperate of renovation, and an idyllic vineyard to make flowing rivers of the finest vino tinto; take a deep breath. Smile. Don’t mention the fact that they don’t know their Cabernet from their Chardonnay. Don’t dare suggest that they learn the lingo and don’t utter a word about the economical and practical unfeasibility. You are wasting your time. A dreamer is a dreamer, and always will be. So just smile, play along and order Sangria… ;)
dw
I don't have time for jigsaws...
08/11/07
The
things that make us happy are the things that we do least often,
the things that we never have time for, agreed?
Are there really too many other things to do? Is it a case of
having time or making time? Do we make time for the things that we
feel we ‘should’ be doing and feel guilty about spending time doing
what we want to do?
We are constantly told that we have to make the time to do whatever
it is that makes us feel good: bake a cake, walk in the mountains,
lounge in the sun, write a poem, take a massage or an afternoon
nap, and all without feeling guilty or sparing a thought for all
the things that are ‘waiting to be done’.
Does anyone really find it that easy??
If it isn’t your wristwatch ticking, it’s your biological clock, or the gentle hush of your grains of sand slipping away!
and how much time do we dedicate to getting ready for life? Priming ourselves to be happy? We get all the little things out of the way so that we can brace ourselves for the big event when it comes. We save for it, talk about it, plan for it, wait for it, get excited about it… about what? There is no big picture!
Life is a jigsaw, not a picture; it’s the little things that make us feel euphoric, feel peaceful, feel sad, feel angry, feel alive, feel. It’s the pieces that fit together to make the big picture!
So I’ve decided, I’m going to collect and share as many jigsaw pieces as I can; give them the time and importance they deserve, slow down, look at each one, savour it, enjoy it then decide which space it might just fit, and move on to find the next one…
dw
Signorina, le faccio una domanda
01/11/07
“Senta,
Lei ha ventotto anni e non ha ancora figli: ha già pensato di
averne? I figli vanno fatti da giovani!”
“Mah, sì, se le dicessi che non voglio figli mentirei. Diciamo che non sono ancora in programma, ecco”
“Lei è fidanzata…? Sposata..?”
Queste domande arrivano sempre, in un colloquio di lavoro. Mi fanno capire tante cose sul mondo del lavoro, persino mi sembra di capire tante cose della cultura del lavoro del nostro paese e della società Italiana.
Dopo un pò di colloqui, ormai ho la risposta pronta e non mi spiazzano più. semplicemente, mi disgustano.
Ho sorriso, ho piantato gli occhi diritto in faccia al mio interlocutore, ho stretto le palpebre come per mettere meglio a fuoco il porro sul suo naso e decisamente ho risposto:
“Convivo”.
“Aah”.
Nel pomeriggio, mentre torno casa in macchina, una pioggia fitta, fitta scende da un cielo carico di nuvole grigie. Il rumore meccanico del tergicristalli singhiozza fuori tempo.
“No, io non vedo più la realtà
né quanta tenerezza ti dà
la mia incoerenza
pensare che vivresti
benissimo anche senza…”
Canto con tutta la voce che ho in corpo, lo canto così forte che quasi non sento più il motore, quasi mi sembra di essere io sul palco, con lunghissimi capelli piastrati e con gli slip a vista.
Guardo nello specchietto e vedo il BMW che mi sta appiccicato e mi accorgo che mentre canto sorrido; sto quasi ridendo, come se fosse davvero su un palco tutta per me, a cantare davanti a tutti i direttori del personale, ai bulli di tutte le scuole, ai tanti che mi hanno sempre guardato dall’alto in basso e commiserata.
Bloccata nel traffico delle sei mi sento forte come il sole di agosto, mi sento dolce come una meringa e viva come una cascata.
Cerco un parcheggio e con calma andrò
al colorificio, Non importa che non ho l’ombrello, voglio andare a
comprare il giallo, del verde, del viola, del lilla e del rosso.
Domenica dipingeremo le pareti della stanzetta: non so ancora se
sarà un maschio o una femmina, ma voglio preparare uno spazio pieno
di colori brillanto per quel cuoricino che sta battendo dentro di
me e che adesso, insieme a me, già sorride.
mm
“Mah, sì, se le dicessi che non voglio figli mentirei. Diciamo che non sono ancora in programma, ecco”
“Lei è fidanzata…? Sposata..?”
Queste domande arrivano sempre, in un colloquio di lavoro. Mi fanno capire tante cose sul mondo del lavoro, persino mi sembra di capire tante cose della cultura del lavoro del nostro paese e della società Italiana.
Dopo un pò di colloqui, ormai ho la risposta pronta e non mi spiazzano più. semplicemente, mi disgustano.
Ho sorriso, ho piantato gli occhi diritto in faccia al mio interlocutore, ho stretto le palpebre come per mettere meglio a fuoco il porro sul suo naso e decisamente ho risposto:
“Convivo”.
“Aah”.
Nel pomeriggio, mentre torno casa in macchina, una pioggia fitta, fitta scende da un cielo carico di nuvole grigie. Il rumore meccanico del tergicristalli singhiozza fuori tempo.
“No, io non vedo più la realtà
né quanta tenerezza ti dà
la mia incoerenza
pensare che vivresti
benissimo anche senza…”
Canto con tutta la voce che ho in corpo, lo canto così forte che quasi non sento più il motore, quasi mi sembra di essere io sul palco, con lunghissimi capelli piastrati e con gli slip a vista.
Guardo nello specchietto e vedo il BMW che mi sta appiccicato e mi accorgo che mentre canto sorrido; sto quasi ridendo, come se fosse davvero su un palco tutta per me, a cantare davanti a tutti i direttori del personale, ai bulli di tutte le scuole, ai tanti che mi hanno sempre guardato dall’alto in basso e commiserata.
Bloccata nel traffico delle sei mi sento forte come il sole di agosto, mi sento dolce come una meringa e viva come una cascata.
mm
Happy Birthday moltohappy.com!
19/10/07
Welcome!
I stumbled across this website in the midst of my search for a
smile; I won’t say a search for ‘true happiness’ but I guess that’s
what this is all about. Aren’t we all? What makes us happy? What
makes us tick?
It wasn’t by chance that this website was born on October 19th,
because so was I, only 28 years earlier, so amongst friends,
laughter and celebrations we welcome a meeting place for ideas, an
open conversation, a blog…we share some interesting plans to grow
together too, but that’s another story..
So for now let’s just try to be moltohappy…
Dani
:)